The Hard Behaviors

Aslahan wrote a wonderful post about some of the hard conversations that a teacher must have with a student over time.  I encourage you to read it, even if you are not yet an instructor.  This got me to thinking about the other side of the relationship, and some of the harder behaviors one should embody as a student, where it may be more beneficial to NOT say something, but, to still take an action that can benefit you as a dancer without disrupting the class.

With all of these strategies, the key is to not “take away” or otherwise make a spectacle out of your actions.  This is a time for discretion, not confrontation.

Issue: The instructor is asking students to do a challenging movement without ensuring they are able to do it.  This could be a Turkish drop, a complex yoga move such as pigeon pose, etc.

Problem: You could get hurt.

Action: Make it a habit to introduce yourself to the instructor before you start to study with them. If you have a limitation or injury, always inform them before class starts and advise them that you may have to modify or exclude yourself from certain movements that involve [X].  Even if you do not have a pre-existing condition, if you are worried that a movement will injure you, STOP.  Do not do it.  If you can modify the move safely do so.  If not, here are some non-disruptive strategies to avoid injury: Use the time to get some water, take some notes off to the side or back of the room, or use the restroom.  If the movement at issue is part of a longer part of the lesson, quietly explore the vending if there is some, take detailed notes on a part of the course you liked, or go outside for some fresh air.

Issue: The instructor starts to explain something in a manner that contradicts what you have been taught, or what your research does not agree with.

Problem: The instructor does not know the material.

Action:  Well, does the instructor really not know?  Or, could it be that you simply have not encountered this explanation yet?  This is a time to be open.  Hear what the instructor has to say.  Listen with an open mind and an accepting expression.  If you are a student with only a little experience under your belt, this is a time to learn that there are both “known” and “speculated” things about our dance.  Take notes, mental or physical, and follow up with your own research.  If you are more experienced, listen for nuggets of truth.  If you have a great deal of experience and know that what is being said is a bunch of hooey,  use the time (while keeping a “listening” expression) for some honest self-assessment: are their things YOU teach as absolutes that you, perhaps should learn more about?  Where are the gaps in your own study?  How many corroborating sources do YOU require before accepting something as “true?”

Issue:  A movement is described one way, then performed another. Or, the students keep trying to get what the instructor says; but, when it is performed for the instructor, the students are told they are doing it wrong.

Problem: The instructor may not be communicating clearly.

Action:  This is the time to ask questions, very carefully worded questions.  As the expression goes, “A problem well stated is a problem half solved.”  As you watch the instructor and the students move, look for places that may prompt a question: the direction of the movement, the placement of the weight, the point of transition.  Try to ask an open ended question (one that cannot be answered “yes” or “no”) to get the most out of the answer.  If needed, follow up with more.  Be sure to ask from a perspective of curiosity, not confrontation, from a place of learning rather than being right.  As you hone your skills at asking questions, you will help others to have the courage to ask and to shape their own questions.

Issue:  The instructor cannot communicate clearly, is asking students to do something dangerous, is clearly not educated in a topic, and may be a bad dancer, to boot.

Problem:  You cannot find anything useful in this class, and it seems like a waste of time to be here.

Action:  This is the hardest situation to be in, for it requires the most professional of responses.  Outwardly, keep an open, “listening” face.  Perform the movements asked, unless they are dangerous, while working on something that is part of your own development (crispness, arm placement, intensity, etc.)  If that is not possible, then there is one action that you can take quietly, and with great discretion: learn what NOT to do.  It is very hard to do this without being noticed; and, the key is to not show that you are doing this.  Take notes, mentally or physically, on things the instructor could be doing to “be better.”  Honestly assess your own actions when you practice, perform, or teach to see if YOU embody any of these behaviors.  Develop strategies to change your own behaviors: How can you identify the simple ones and remove them? How can you break down the complex ones to over come them?  This is the time for the greatest discretion and greatest honesty.  Resist the urge to make a show of  your discomfort with the situation, and turn it into the most valuable learning opportunity.  Remember, even manure helps things to grow, when applied properly.

These are the top three issues I could think of after reading Aslahan’s wonderful post.  There are probably others, too.  Again, the key is to get what you can out of every course you take – even if it is learning what not to do.

To quote my beloved, late grandmother, “Discretion is the better part of valor.”